Unfortunately, aging is one phase of life that is often associated with losing independence and changes in mood and cognitive abilities. This can lead to your aging loved ones being reluctant to admit that they need help or even accept offers of help from you. In this article, we share with you why seniors refuse help and what to do if you find yourself in this situation .
How Older Adults Assert Their Independence
If you tried to offer your loved one help by claiming that they are unable to do something by themselves, you may have noticed that they did not take to this kindly. Instead, they may respond with one of the following reactions:
- Proving You Wrong: Individuals may feel that they know something well due to their life’s experiences. When misunderstandings occur, they may not want to admit a mistake was made.
- Arguing: If you forbid your loved one to do something out of worry for their safety, they may argue with you, claiming that they are perfectly capable.
- Hiding: Instead of arguing with you, some older adults may simply continue to do what they wish to do while hiding it from you.
- Childish Behavior: Unfortunately, it is common for medical professionals and outside help to address you instead of your loved ones. This could signal exclusion to your loved ones and make them feel like they’re being treated as a child, which could cause them to exhibit childish behavior.
Having a strong sense of self-esteem is important. Older adults may feel that their independence is threatened when you forbid them to do certain things. Although you have their best interests in mind, it may not come across that way to them.
How to Offer Your Aging Parent Help Without Facing Resistance
You may already have realized that outright forbidding your parent to do something won’t work out. If you’ve tried this unsuccessfully , the following techniques could yield better results :
- Word Your Offers Carefully: Instead of telling your loved ones that you will drop them off because it’s unsafe for them to drive, offer to bring them to their appointment and go for lunch afterward out of loving kindness. Positioning your offer this way may help them see this as meaningful bonding time instead of stripping them of their independence.
- Think About What They Are Capable of: To avoid resistance, think about what your loved one is capable of doing. Is it possible that you have underestimated their abilities out of worry for their safety? Next time, emphasize this when offering to help them.
Come to Morada Quintessence for Senior Assisted Living and Respite Care
Does your loved one require a level of assistance you cannot provide from home? Morada Quintessence is a retirement community of choice for residents in the Albuquerque, NM area. Our senior living apartments come fully equipped with modern fixtures and senior-friendly safety features, such as an emergency call system. Onsite, your loved one can receive help with personal care assistance in a respectful and dignified manner, allowing them to live their best life without worries!
